A Lovely Solution
by Officially Retired
Summary: How does a kidnapped princess end up as a SLAYERS hot spring vacation at a mysterious resort? You'll have to read to find out! TRAD and XelFi pairings... Very Romantic! COMPLETE!
1. Chapter One

**DISCLAIMER:**_**… I do not own the Slayers, but you already knew that. (n.n)  
**_

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_Behold! The first chapter of eight!_

_Next chapter will up tomorrow! **(n.-)**  
_

_Enjoy!  
_

_**- Nicci**_

_P.S. For you regulars wondering why I'm so late, long day at work...** (o.o)  
**_

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**Chapter One**

_On the Behalf of Miss Amelia…_

* * *

"Oy Sven!" Rafe the Roughneck bellowed, tossing a wrapped bundle to his fellow bandit. He was far to comfortable on his large mound of gold to get up and hand it to him. Really, once you sat on a giant mound of gold you found it was a lot more comfortable than it looked. "Open this thing up for us, but real careful like. I'd do it meself but it's making a weird humming noise."

"Ah!" Sven protested, fumbling to catch the bundle from atop his own pile of gold. "But I opened the last one. My eyebrows still haven't grown back. Stupid magic thingies. You open it Dodd!"

The package was in the air once more as it was hurled quickly to the one sitting atop several barrels of rum. Dodd caught it shaking his head fervently. "No way! It's humming! You know what else hums! Fairies!"

Dodd was terribly afraid of fairies. He'd never seen one but he was sure they were just downright nasty and cruel. No, sir, no fairies for Dodd, and no humming package either!

"You open it!" He yelled, chucking it towards the beige grabbed man beside him.

"Thanks. Don't mind if I do." He replied coolly, hiding his smirk behind his beige mask.

"Wait!" Rafe cried, hopping off his mound of gold in rage. "Dodd, you idiot! He's not with us!"

"He's not?" Dodd replied, eyeing him in weary surprise.

"No." Zelgadiss replied, pulling down his mask and flashing a knowing grin at the stunned bandits. "I'm not. But I'll open it for you all the same."

"The hells you will!" Sven cried, hopping up from his own mound of gold and drawing his sword.

"No! Wait!" Rafe cut in, wrapping an arm around Sven and hissing in his ear. "Let's let him open it. If it explodes, then we's safe, if not, we's rob him. That's smarts, ya see?"

"Yeah! Yeah, I sees." Sven agreed, sheaving his sword and nodding to the chimera s Rafe let him out of the headlock. "Alright. You opens it, then. Unless you're to scared!"

"Yeah!" Dodd chortled loudly. "Unless you're too scared."

Scared? Zelgadiss snorted at the thought. Not a chance. Although he was a little nervous, the chimera was always nervous when holding a potential cure. He hated to be let down, to feel like the whole journey had been a waste, to be reminded that he was a freak yesterday and tomorrow he'd still be a freak.

Not to mention… often potential cures had certain… side effects.

Zelgadiss held back a delicate shudder as he remember the unpleasant tryst he'd had with an orb that had resulted in rather than turning him back from chimera into man, into a woman, and then an ogre, then a troll, and then finally back into a chimera.

One of the few times he was glad to be a chimera, that and the time he'd found a golden egg that had turned him into a chicken. No one wants to be a chicken, which of course was also female. Thank goodness all it took to get outta that one was to lay an egg. An experience, he'd never like to repeat, or ever speak of…

"He is, Rafe!" Sven whispered irritably. "Look! No way he's gonna do…"

Sven was cut off as Zelgadiss ripped the fabric from the parcel, increasing the humming three-fold; and it was easy to see why…

"**_FAIRIES!!!_**" Dodd cried in terror before bolting into the surrounding foliage as fast as his stubby legs would take him.

"Well whaddya know..." Rafe muttered in awe as Sven gawked.

Zelgadiss paid them no mind, of course they were fairies; he knew that. What he was curious about was if they really granted wishes; or if they were just vicious baby thieves. The legends said so many things.

He just hoped they didn't bite. Not cause it'd hurt, but he couldn't say he relished the thought of having a pissed off fairy on his hands, and biting a rock would probably do it.

The chimera never got a chance to find out though for it soon became apparent why they had been covered in a magic cloaks to begin with. They were loud, and the louder their humming got the brighter the crystal cage holding them got.

It was far too much for Zelgadiss' sensitive eyes and ears, even the remaining two bandits were wincing and holding their ears.

And then, the crystal shattered and they flew up into the starry night leaving Zelgadiss to stare mournfully up at them as he debated pleading with them to come back. In then end he deiced they most certainly wouldn't so why lower he pride in front of two irritable bandits.

And then he remembered he was being glared at by two irritable bandits.

And then he smiled.

* * *

O O O

* * *

Later, as Dodd screams continued to echo throughout the forest, a rider atop a tall white horse made his way into the clearing where Zelgadiss was gathering up things he valued of worth from the vanquished Rafe and Sven's piles.

"Zelgadiss Greywers?" The rider asked and the chimera whirled at him sword drawn.

"And you are?" He asked coldly.

The rider clasped his hand to his heart and flashed a seal. "Sir Rudding of Saillune, Master Greywers. I ride on behalf of the Princess Amelia."

"Amelia?" He asked curiously, stashing back away his sword. "Is she all right?"

"I'm afraid I was sent to bring word…" He looked away wearily. "That she has been kidnapped."

"Kidnapped?" Zelgadiss echoed in shock. "By whom?"

"I'm afraid I cannot divulge any more information." He replied with a shake of his head. "You'll be briefed at the palace."

"Well then…" He muttered, dropping the gold and grabbing the horses reigns. "I hope you don't mind if we fly."

To be honest the rider did mind, but if the frightening looking chimera was strong enough to carry a horse and himself on the wind, he certainly wasn't going to argue with him.

* * *

O O O

* * *

Filia sighed happily, wandering into the kitchen and setting Val's down egg in a basket on the counter.

"You can wait right here." She stated prettily, kissing the top of its shell reassuringly before turning to the stove and gathering up the kettle to fill it with water.

"You know, Filia!" An unexpected but familiar voice spoke up from behind her. "I find it mildly disturbing that you sleep with that thing!"

"No." She stated softly, reassuring herself shakily as the kettle danced along with her nerves. "That's not Xelloss' voice. Nope. In fact, you're probably having one of those terrible nightmares where he comes demanding tea and then demands some scones to go with it even though both of you know he doesn't _eat_ scones!"

"Oh my! Truly Filia, I find your dreams about me as fascinating as the thought that you do dream of me!" The voice tittered annoyingly.

"You're really here!" She screamed whirling around and blinking in stunned horror. "But… but why?"

"Why for the tea, of course!" He replied arching finger smartly and cracking an eye. "And some scones!"

Filia promptly screamed and woke up, clutching her blankets to her in a cold sweat, and then she noticed she wasn't alone in the room, and she screamed again!

"The scone dream again?" Xelloss asked curiously.

Filia nodded miserably, holding the blankets to her chest sadly. "It gets worst every time."

"Hm, you have the strangest dreams, Filia." He muttered in dry amusement, wandering over and opening her curtains wide just to watch her wince.

"At least I can _have_ dreams!" She retorted irritably, rubbing her blinded eyes.

"Ah! So mean!" Xelloss chided in a hurt tone, cracking an eye. "Honestly Filia, you golden dragons are so cranky first thing in the morning."

"Then why don't you visit me later in the day?" She replied, getting out of the bed with a little stretch and a yawn. "I mean I appreciate you telling me what the groups up to in exchange for tea but tea time isn't even until four. You always show up so early!"

Xelloss beamed maddeningly at her. "Cause I feel the need to get the most tea possible for my info, of course!"

"Uh, Xelloss." Filia sighed, tying her robe around her and walking over to Val's egg to give it a "Good Morning" rub.

"Actually, though." He stated darkly, opening his eyes and leaning in on his staff. "Today I came with a piece of "Free" information."

"Free?" Filia echoed, arching a brow warily. "Then I'm sure it can't be good."

Xelloss shook his head slowly and Filia heart dropped.

"Who… who is it?" She asked worriedly.

"Amelia." He replied crisply. "Kidnapped."

"By who?" Filia asked, rushing to her closet and pulling out her traveling dress.

"From what I can tell, it appears to be an inside job." He replied dryly. "And since it's Saillune I figured I rather have you do the poking around."

"Tsk, Xelloss." She muttered, rolling her eyes and nodding to the door. "Right. Well, just give me a moment to get dressed."

"Why, Filia!" He chided smartly, fading into nothing. "You know I don't use doors!"

Filia felt an amused smile tug on her lips and quickly quelled it. She had no idea what Xelloss really came over here once a month for, but she was certain it wasn't the tea or to tell his little tales.

And it certainly wasn't the scones either…

Filia gave a delicate little shudder and quickly got dressed.

* * *

O O O

* * *

"I find it amazing that you leave the care of the only Ancient Dragon in the world to those two servants of yours!" Xelloss chided wanly as the appeared before the Saillune gates, knowing fully how much she hated when he called them her servants.

"They're perfectly capable and they're not my servants!" She replied tersely, her eyebrow devolving a small twitch.

"I don't recall you ever paying them once since you all moved in together, Filia." He replied goadingly, watching with glee as her twitch grew.

"Only because they won't let me!" She argued heatedly. "One time I woke up to find Jilas trying to sick the money back into my purse! I finally just gave up!"

"And now they're your servants!" Xelloss summed up for her cheerfully, tittering as her rage fumed over.

"Uh! Xelloss! You! You!" She huffed.

"Me!" He agreed, his smirk growing wider as he turned around. "And Miss Lina, and Gourry too!"

"Miss Lina!" Filia cried dashing in front of him. "Why it's so good to see you and Gourry! Xelloss told me that you guys have had some crazy adventures while treasure hunting! Something about the world's largest sword?"

"It was really big." Gourry agreed, nodding vigorously. "I mean, _really_ big!"

"You saw that, huh Xelloss?" Lina asked suspiciously. "Funny, since we didn't see you…"

"Didn't you?" Xelloss asked, beaming easily. "Well I suppose I do try to _blend_ in!"

"Uh-huh." Lina replied dryly, crossing her arms and arching a brow. "So when Gourry removed the sword from the stone and it was so heavy that it fell behind him and got wedged in an even _bigger_ rock, you just sort of hid out and watched as we tried everything in chaos to bust it loose?"

"I suppose you could look at it that way!" Xelloss replied easily. Grinning wide as Lina rolled her eyes.

"You're just horrible, Xelloss." Filia scolded, crossing her arms. "At least now I know why they couldn't get the sword out. You were probably the rock!"

"Nonsense!" He chided wanly. "Why that would be… Oh look! Zelgadiss is here!"

"Very funny, Xelloss." He muttered, releasing the reigns and crossing his arms as landed causing the horse to buck off the already quite green-in-the-face Sir Rudding. "You should work on some original material."

"Funny you should say that!" Xelloss replied cracking an eye knowingly. "Because I have this absolutely fascinating tale about _scones_--"

The chimera arched a brow as the dragoness quickly lunged to cover Xelloss' mouth with her hand, mildly surprised when she succeeded.

The reason he let her soon became obvious as the gates opened, and out stepped Amelia who was smiling wide.

"You all came to rescue me?" She asked happily, tilting her head in Xelloss and Filia's direction. "Even you Mr. Xelloss and Miss Filia? You too Miss Lina and Mr. Gourry!"

"Sure did." Lina replied smugly, arching a curious brow. "Although you don't seem to really need it…"

"And you too, Mr. Zelgadiss?" She asked softly meeting his eyes with hers causing him to quickly look away.

"Well yeah… of course… but…" He fumbled, not quite certain what was happening here.

"Then you have rescued me!" She giggled happily. "From myself! There never was any kidnapping! I just wanted to get all of you together! It's been so long since we've been together like this!"

"You…" Lina fumbled, face-faulting and gazing up at her helplessly. "You _kidnapped_ yourself!"

"A _very_ inside job…" Filia whispered, her hand still over Xelloss' mouth as he responded with a quick nod.

"Yep!" She replied proudly. "And it worked! Now you're all here and we can have brunch!"

"Amelia…" Lina growled, capturing the princess in a head-lock. "That isn't very _Just_! Now is it?"

"But…" Amelia coughed, tugging on the sorceress' arm. "But… I was… lonely… and… you… all… work… too… hard… _justice… _please… Miss… Lina…"

Gourry laughed and Lina sighed letting her go. "Fine. You know I'd never turn down a free meal, and you're right. Now way you'd every get us all here any other way."

She raising a finger threateningly. "But next time, you better _really_ be kidnapped! I mean bound and gagged in a castle tower guarded by trolls somewhere kidnapped!"

Amelia smiled, rubbing her neck. "Okay, Miss Lina."

"Alright then!" Lina declared, thrusting a finger into the air commandingly. "Let's do brunch!"

* * *

_____**And it begins...**_

_____**Hee, see ya tomorrow! (n.n)  
**_


	2. Chapter Two

**DISCLAIMER_: _**_**I still do not own the Slayers... (n.n)  
**_

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_Yea! I'm so glad you're all having fun with this! __**(n.n)**_

_Here's chapter two then! **(n.-)**_

_Enjoy!**  
**_

_**- Nicci**_

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_**Special Thanks To:**__**

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**_

**Story Weaver1**

_Thank you! I like writing them this way. I love em dark and I love em funny. This ones all funny. _**_(n.-)_  
**

**

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Shadow Ice Maiden**

_Tee-hee! Me too!_ _**(n.n)**_

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**Humi**

_Thank you so much! I hope you like where this goes. __**(n.-)**_

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**fantasia-49**

_Hee! Thank you, thank you!_

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**Hizeki**

_Heh, thanks! **(n.n)** "Oy" to you, Polina! **(n.-)**_

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**Chapter Two**

_Amelia and Xelloss Have A Chat…_

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_

"Fairies?" Amelia repeated with a little giggle. "Wow, Mr. Zelgadiss! You've been so busy!"

Zelgadiss gave a little shrug. "Well, I have nothing but time now that I'm not hanging around Lina."

"Just what are you implying?" The sorceress growled, not daring to look away from her fork to fork battle with Gourry over the last sausage.

"That you keep things from getting boring I think!" Gourry offered causing Lina to gawk in awe, giving him just enough time to dive in and toss the sausage into his mouth.

"Hey!" Lina bellowed, catching on as the swordsman chewed his prize with a smug grin.

"No fair randomly being intelligent in order to steal my food!" She declared as she strangled him. Gourry continued chewing quite pleased with himself.

Amelia giggled, leaning on her hand with a little sigh. "I sure missed you guys. I really wish you'd come back and visit more."

"Aw." Lina grinned, releasing Gourry and settling back into her chair. "We missed you too."

"Why don't you all stay the night?" Amelia cried, clasping her hands together happily. "I keep all of your guest rooms the same when you're gone!"

She nodded to Xelloss and Filia who were trying to keep straight faces while kicking each other under the table. "Except for you Miss Filia, but I have really nice room I can put you up in!"

"Oh!" Filia murmured, surprised at the thought of having a sleepover. "Well alright. I have been pretty busy lately, a break could be nice!"

"Great!" Amelia cried, clapping her hands together. "Then it's settled!"

She bit her lip and looked over at Xelloss. "Um… Mr. Xelloss, can I talk to you for a moment?"

The table gawked and the mazoku cracked an amused grin. "Oh, my! Why of course Miss Amelia!"

"We'll be right back, pay us no mind!" Amelia fumbled quickly, standing up and heading out into the hallway. The crew gawked, food forgotten as Xelloss phased out to join her.

"Ooh!" Filia fumed, crossing her arms and sitting back in her chair with a huff. "Well I don't like that!"

"Nor do I." The chimera agreed, narrowing his gaze on the door darkly.

"It is pretty strange." Lina agreed, thumbing her lip in thought. "Of course, all of this is a little strange for Amelia."

"People get strange when you leave 'em alone for too long." Gourry offered, nodding sagely. "There is this mystic back in my hometown who has a hundred cats!"

"Yeah but we were only away for…" Lina trailed off stunned. "Whoa. Has it really been three years?"

"It has." Zelgadiss agreed with a curt nod, arching a brow at Lina pointedly. "You'd know that if you ever came to her birthday parties."

"I always get the invitation too late!" Lina protested sullenly. "I bet Filia doesn't even get an invitation!"

Filia shook her head in a combination of sadness and curiosity. "I would like to attend a birthday party. Do you think I should throw one for Val when he hatches?"

"Hatched, born, same thing really. Go for it." Lina replied with a shrug, arching her eyebrows curiously at Zelgadiss. "How do you manage to attend her birthday every year, anyway?"

"I know when it is, so I stick close by." He replied with a shrug.

Lina arched a brow, smirk tugging on her lips. "Oh! So that's how it is, eh Zel?"

The chimera would not dignify that with a response. Luckily he didn't need to as Amelia strolled back in looking quite pleased with herself.

"Alright!" She cried, clasping her hands together happily. "Everything is all set! First let's go and play in the garden for a couple of hours and then we can have lunch!"

Lina beamed, wandering over and clapping the princess on the back. "You know Amelia, I really _should_ visit more often…"

* * *

O O O

* * *

Amelia waited nervously in the hallway. Everyone had gone to bed several hours ago and she was certain that they were finally asleep, Zelgadiss being the last to drift off as always. He was always on guard, yet another reason for her to love him.

Of course, it was that very same attribute that made it so hard for her to work her way into his caged stone heart.

"So, then Miss Amelia." Xelloss' voice spoke up as he melded into the darkness of the hallway to join her. "Are we ready to begin!"

Amelia bit her lip and nodded. "Do you think it terribly unjust of me to do this Mr. Xelloss?"

Xelloss smirked into the darkness. "Unjust? Not at all! You are the princess and they should treat you with more care! Abandoning you like that!"

"This isn't about punishment!" Amelia argued ardently. "You understand don't you? If not I don't want your help!"

Xelloss chuckled, shaking his head. "No I understand your motives, Miss Amelia! And make no mistake I'm helping because it amuses me, not because I think your plans are deliciously nefarious!"

"Nefarious?" Amelia echoed softly, the guilt beginning to trickle in.

Xelloss sighed, cracking an eye and leaning in on his staff. "Do you want to go through with this or not, Miss Amelia?"

Amelia bit her lip but held her ground, standing tall and giving a quick nod of affirmation.

"Then have your best sorcerers put all of them into an even deeper sleep!" He grinned, fading away once more. "And let's get this show on the road!"

* * *

O O O

* * *

Lina awoke stretching irritably.

"Uh!" She groaned, blinking open her eyes. "I feel like a slept on a rock!"

Once her eyes were open she blinked at her surroundings in mild disconcertion. Apparently, that was because she _had_ slept on a rock!

"Wake up Gourry!" She hissed, poking the snoring swordsman who immediately popped up sword drawn.

"Who!" He cried, looking to and fro in growing suspicion. "Where?"

"Good questions, Gourry." Lina sighed, standing up and stretching once more. "I suspect the answers are Amelia and Xelloss, and in a cave somewhere."

She approached the opening of the cave and stuck her head out curiously. "The real question though is _why_?"

"Because Amelia decided we needed a vacation." Zelgadiss stated poking the fire he'd made in the clearing outside with a stick.

"And so Xelloss kidnapped us!" Filia yelled, fists clenched as she attempted to stare burning daggers through the maddeningly grinning mazoku.

"I keep telling you it was _her_ idea, Filia!" He beamed. "I'm so proud of her!"

"A… Amelia?" Lina choked, glancing at the miserable looking princess. "This was _your_ idea?"

"Well I just figured you guys were always so busy!" She cried, wringing her hands. "I just thought you deserved a vacation!"

"A vacation." Lina repeated deadpan and Amelia nodded adamantly.

"I already booked six rooms at the hot springs!" She explained quickly. "I got meal vouchers and everything! They are the best hot springs this side of the Katahto Mountains!"

"So let me get this straight…" Lina summed up calmly, wrapping an arm around the princess. "You faked your own kidnapping in order to lure us to your palace; then you had Xelloss kidnap us and drag us out here just so you could make sure we got a full paid vacation?"

"I was afraid you'd say no…" She whispered in a small voice.

Lina wasn't sure if she and Gourry would have gone along or not, let alone Zelgadiss and the others, but there was one thing she _was_ sure of!

"Alright, Amelia!" She declared with a wide grin. "You win. I promise I'll never leave you alone for three years ever again."

"Not let's get to town! I'm hungry!"

* * *

_____**Ooh, the plot thickens...**_

_____**Hee, see ya tomorrow! (n.-)**_


	3. Chapter Three

**DISCLAIMER_: _**_**I still do not own the Slayers... (n.n)  
**_

* * *

_Whew! Almost didn't make it home in time!_

_Hee, but I did. **(n.-)**_

_Enjoy!**  
**_

_**- Nicci**_

* * *

_**Special Thanks To:**__**

* * *

**_

**Humi**

_That's right! And she's the only princess who does! __**(n.-)**_

* * *

**fantasia-49**

_Heh, definitely gonna be fun for us I'd say! **(n.n)**_

**

* * *

Shadow Ice Maiden**

_Hee! Hopefully Zelgadiss can help her pick 'em back up again._ _**(n.-)**_

* * *

**Esil**

_Not to worry, this will be nothing like the last time, I assure you. _**_(n.-)

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_Hizeki**

_Hee, tada! **(n.-)**_

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**Chapter Three**

__

___Welcome to Mt. Vailis...  
_

_

* * *

  
_

"Here we are!" Amelia cried happily, directing a hand to each direction of the small mountain town. "Mt. Vailis! Food, art, and Relaxation!"

She giggled happily, doing a little twirl before latching on the chimera's arm and pointing forward to a gaggle of shops. "Come on Mr. Zelgadiss! Let go look around!"

"O…okay." He replied, allowing the princess to happily drag him away.

"Woah." Gourry breathed, motioning quickly to Lina. "Lina! Come here! Read this restaurant's sign!"

"What it is, Gourry?" She asked eagerly, standing on her toes to read in full. "Mountain Cuisine!"

She looked at Gourry with wide food-lusting eyes the size of dinner plates and he nodded fervently. "Keep reading!"

"Yak, goat, and _Yeti_!" She read aloud greedily.

"_Yeti_!" Gourry echoed in awe.

"You know what, Gourry…" Lina stated, latching an arm around his pleasantly. "I'm buying!"

"Yeti!" Gourry declared once more, this time in victorious affirmation as he and Lina marched into the restaurant.

"But…" Filia murmured, realizing that now she was completely alone.

Well…

Not _completely_…

"It says here that Mt. Vailis' hot springs are frequented by honeymooners and lovers across the world." Xelloss read aloud informatively. "Due to this an economic boom has transformed this mountain town in to a region of mass commerce as well as a place for relaxation and recreation."

Xelloss looked up from the book to find Filia staring at him.

"What?" He asked nonplussed. "I always read with my eyes closed!"

"Why are you still here?" Filia asked, mildly suspicious.

"I'd keep it a secret, but why bother?" He sighed, shaking his head in bemusement. "It's because Lord Beastmaster thinks it's funny."

Filia giggled, covering her mouth to try and stop herself but the bizarre closed eyes glare Xelloss gave her just made her giggle more.

Xelloss sighed, closing the book loudly.

"Why do you have so many tour guides anyway?" Filia asked, arching a brow curiously.

"I really think that answer should be obvious." He replied wanly, closing it and placing it back into his pack.

"Wait…" Filia stated slowly, waiting till his closed met hers curiously.

"What else do you have in there, Xelloss?"

* * *

O O O

* * *

"Over here Zelgadiss." Amelia ushered in an awed whisper, pointing to the sign above the shop.

"Cold as Ice Sculpting." He read curiously, standing beside her and staring in awe through the window.

"They're beautiful..." Amelia whispered in awe, placing a hand against the glass as she appraised a glass sculpture of a beautiful ice princess; snowflakes in her hair instead of flowers.

_They really are._ Zelgadiss thought, glancing down at the princess with a little smile as she took in the rest of the shop through the window.

_They really are…

* * *

  
_

O O O

* * *

"Wait…" Lina repeated slowly, still holding the menu as she gawked at the waiter. "We get to pick our own _goat_?"

"Why yes, good lady." The waiter replied, capping his hands together twice and five goats were led out before them. "As you can see they are all in prime condition, not too young, and certainly not too old."

Lina and Gourry stared at each other in jaws dropped in silent shock.

"That's…" Lina breathed, a small evil grin complete with fangs lighting up her face. "Awesome!"

Gourry nodded eagerly, banging his fork and his knife on the table with enthusiasm.

"Wait…" Lina trailed, off apprising Gourry with curious eyes before arching a brow at the waiter.

"Do we get to pick our own _Yeti_?"

* * *

O O O

* * *

"Ha!" Filia cried, slapping cards on the table and discarding quickly. "GIN! I win! Now show me what's in the bag!"

Xelloss sighed, letting his own cards fall to the table. "I knew I should have cheated."

"A deal's a deal, Xelloss!" Filia declared smugly, sitting up tall and eagerly clearing the table. "Now come on! Let's have it!"

Xelloss smirked, mentally replacing the contents with ease.

"I don't know, Filia!" He chided mischievously. "Are you sure _want_ to know what a mazoku keeps in his traveling bag!"

"Oh, please!" She replied, waving off the thought. "You're the only mazoku I know who has one!"

"I'm the only mazoku you know _period_." He muttered under his breath, causing both of them to twitch.

"Fine then." He replied, arching both brows and pulling himself up fully as Filia leaned in curiously. "Here you are, Miss Filia!"

* * *

O O O

* * *

"Oh, Mr. Zelgadiss!" Amelia cooed, spinning around in delight. "Aren't they all so very lovely! I just love them all!"

Zlegadiss smiled softly, unseen by the princess' closed eye, and certainly not by the sculpted eyes of the multitude of glass sculpted music boxes. Ballerinas and fools, princes and monsters; with all of them playing music this way he found himself drawn to the memory of the fairies he'd lost back in that glen.

Yet with that joyful smile of mirth and jubilee on the Princess' face as she twirled to and fro, arms stretched out wide almost as if she could feel each music boxes harmonic tune…

Zelgadiss found he couldn't really feel so bad about it anymore...

* * *

O O O

* * *

"Best… meal… ever…" Lina breathed, slipping down in her chair and patting her now full belly.

"Em-hm!" Gourry agreed, picking his teeth with a small bone as he relaxed with the other hand on his knee as he propped his leg up on the table, the other stretched out as long as it could go.

"Now we only have to try dragon cuisine." She stated with an eager grin, drooling a little despite feeling so very full.

She winced briefly, nodding to herself before arching a knowing brow at Gourry.

"But maybe we should wait till Filia is no longer traveling with us…"

* * *

O O O

* * *

Filia watched in silent terror as the contents of the bag spilled out covering the table.

It was horrible!

Nothing in the world could have prepared her for this!

Nothing in the world could have prepared her for…

"**_SCONES!!!_**"

* * *

_____**On A side note, I met the goat I was to have for dinner once... I'd prefer not to have to do that again! (o.X)  
**_

_____**See ya tomorrow! (n.n)**_


	4. Chapter Four

**DISCLAIMER_: _**_**I still do not own the Slayers... (n.n)  
**_

* * *

_And now for chapter four, where we finally establish the full plot!  
_

_Hee, Enjoy!**  
**_

_**- Nicci**_

* * *

_**Special Thanks To:**__**

* * *

**_

**Humi**

_Hee! Why that's the best kind of evil freak! __**(n.n)**_

* * *

**fantasia-49**

_And now the fun gets funner! **(n.-)**_

**

* * *

Shadow Ice Maiden**

_Yea! That's just what I'm going for!_ _**(n.n)**_

* * *

**Kayla-chan1990**

_Hee! Awesome! Hope you love where this goes.** (n.-)**_

* * *

**Chapter Four**

_Three Girls and A Hot Spring…

* * *

  
_

"Ah!" Lina sighed, sinking deeper into the steaming water, the towel slipping over her eyes as they closed in satisfaction. "I can't think of the last time I got to really enjoy a hot spring! It seems like something crazy always happens!"

"Always?" Filia asked curiously, resting her arm on the side of the tub and propping up her head curiously.

"Yep." Lina muttered, the towel slipping lower causing her to blow hard to get it away from her mouth. "Every time. But not this time, eh Amelia!"

"Nope…" Amelia sighed in a happy little voice, sinking lower into the water happily. Blowing a few bubbles. "Not this time…"

* * *

O O O

* * *

"You know Zelgadiss…" Xelloss spoke up chidingly. "You look a little tense! I hear this resort has an excellent masseuse!"

"Who in their right mind would try and loosen up a stone-skinned chimera?" Zelgadiss asked dryly, not bothering to look up from his sketch book as he expertly etched his way across it with a shard of charcoal. "Really Xelloss. If you're gonna try and get under my skin at least try and make your taunts realistic."

"Getting under your skin being the intended pun there…" Xelloss muttered under his breath.

"Just because you lower your head and turn it sideways, doesn't mean I can't still _hear_ you." The chimera muttered, still not bothering to look up from his work.

"No." Xelloss agreed, turning back to him with a grin and arching a finger smartly. "But it does mean that I _meant_ you to!"

"Hmpt." Zelgadiss grumbled darkly, his eyes still on his unfolding sketch.

"Why, Zelgadiss!" Xelloss chided, phasing to the chimera's other side to get a better look. "Is that a fairy princess?!"

The chimera felt his cheeks heat and quickly closed the book back up. "I don't have to explain my art to _you_, Xelloss."

"And say…" Xelloss went on, tapping his chin in feigned thought. "That fairy princess! Why, she sort of looked like Amelia!"

Xelloss beamed maddeningly at the glowering chimera. "Why Zelgadiss! Were you just drawing a picture of Amelia as a Fairy Princess!"

They sat like that for a moment, a beaming mazoku and a glowering chimera.

"You're just bored, aren't you?" Zelgadiss finally responded in a dry tone.

"Quite." Xelloss sighed, leaning his head back against the wall and cracking an eye at the chimera. "Are you sure you don't want to let me cause even the slightest amount of mischief?"

Zelgadiss gave him a warning glare and Xelloss grinned hopefully. "Nothing serious, I swear! Just something to liven things up!"

Zelgadiss snorted, leaning his head back and staring at the door to the changing room. "No. Go join Gourry if you're so bored."

"I make it not a point to get naked with strange men." Xelloss replied wanly, cracking an eye. "Makes 'em jealous."

Zelgadiss clenched his teeth in dark annoyance. "Then go home!"

"Nope." Xelloss replied with a sigh. "That's not an option either. So Zelgadiss, do _you_ want to entertain _me_, or do you want me to entertain the both of us?"

Zelgadiss sunk his head back against the wall, eying the door calmly. "Well… they have been in there a long time."

"Yeah!" Gourry agreed stepping into the hallway, one towel wrapped around his waist the other drying off his hair. "I bet Lina's hungry! I know I am!"

Xelloss and Zelgadiss shared a long look. Xelloss beamed, Zelgadiss glowered but hung his head in resignation.

"You know Gourry, you may be right!" Xelloss agreed, standing to his feet and wrapping an arm around the swordsman; directing him towards the kitchens. "You should go get _both_ of you something to eat! In fact! I bet Miss Amelia and Miss Filia may even be hungry as well!"

"Hey, yeah!" Gourry agreed, his eyes lighting up. "Yeah! I should go get _all_ of us some food! Everyone should have something to eat when they're having fun! It makes fun even more fun!"

"It sure does!" Xelloss agreed, cracking an eye at the glowering chimera.

"_Yeah_." Gourry repeated one more time, this time with stern resolve as he headed down the hall. "Don't you worry Lina! I've got your back."

"I think she's going to be more worried about him seeing it." Zelgadiss muttered glaring up at Xelloss as the mazoku watched the unwitting swordsmen head off with an evil smirk.

"And yet you didn't step in, Zelgadiss!" Xelloss countered, cracking an eye knowingly.

"Only because Gourry's sacrifice will hopefully disrupt our time together." He replied coolly, standing to his feet and heading towards his room. "I don't even care enough to stay and watch."

"Hm." Xelloss stated dryly, watching him go nonplussed. "That guy is positively no fun."

"I got it!" Gourry stated proudly, holding up an armful of food. "Fruit and cheese galore! Lina loves cheese! Course Lina also loves fruit, and well, Lina loves everything!"

_Oh I doubt very much she'll love this!_ Xelloss thought with a merry smirk, clapping the swordsman on the back. "Good job, Gourry! Now…"

Before his wonderfully entertaining plan could leave his lips however, the doors to the changing room were nearly ripped open as the three haphazardly dressed females bolted out into the hallway.

"Lina!" Gourry called, holding his arms full of food out to her. "Look! I've got fruit! And Cheese!"

"Fruit! Cheese!" Lina replied scrunching up her nose in disgust as she smacked it out of the unsuspecting swordsman's hands before latching onto one of his arm with a look of blazing hunger in her eager eyes. "No! I want _chocolate_! Lots and lots of chocolate!"

"Chocolate?" The swordsman echoed in awe. Warming to the change of plan delightedly as Lina nodded emphatically. "Of course! Chocolate!"

"Chocolate!" Lina agreed bobbing up and down eagerly.

"Chocolate!" They cried together, dashing off to find some, neither noticing Gourry was still in a towel.

"I want _flowers_, pretty little flowers; lots of pretty little flowers…" The princess stated happily, arms held out as she twirled and danced her way after them, humming a little tune.

"Hmm…" Xelloss stated, tapping his chin despite his delighted grin. "Amusing! But definitely not normal!"

He glanced over at still remaining dragoness, who was staring deeply into her own reflection in the green orbs of her head dress. "And what do you want, Filia?"

"What do I want?" She responded coolly, meeting his gaze setting her headdress back on her head as if it were a priceless crown. "Jewelry, Xelloss. I want jewelry."

Xelloss grinned, arching a brow with a coy smirk as he held out an arm for her to take, wondering idly if she would.

And she did! Well, Xelloss certainly wasn't feeling bored now!

"Then by all means!" He stated merrily, wondering just where this new development would take them as he faded them away, town in mind. "Let's go get you some!"

* * *

_____**Oh yes Lina, definitely this time! (n.n)**_

_____**Hee! The madness and fun begins!  
**_

_____**See ya tomorrow! (n.-)**_


	5. Chapter Five

**DISCLAIMER_: _**_**I still do not own the Slayers... (n.n)  
**_

* * *

_Hee, now time for things to get a little wild, and just a little weird. **(n.-)**  
_

_**- Nicci**_

* * *

_**Special Thanks To:**__**

* * *

**_

**Humi**

_Oh, Humi, you know me! Always a rational explanation, but still gotta keep ya guessing! Cause that's how I roll... __**(n.-)**_

* * *

**VFIN**

_It's cause I'm Half-French, and All-Geek! Hee, good to know Zelgabunny is still a hit! **(n.n)**_

**

* * *

Shadow Ice Maiden**

_Hee! Naturally! And it's only gonna get worse..._ _**(n.-)**_

* * *

**Kayla-chan1990**

_Heh! Yes it is! And it starts... **NOW!  
**_

_**

* * *

**_**Chapter Five**

_What A Girl Wants…

* * *

_

Zelgadiss sighed to himself tiredly, holding open his book and staring hard at his sketch. Amelia's eyes were staring back at him with that alluring awe she always through his way.

Why, though? Try as he might he could never understand just what the small princess saw in the likes of him. When she had been younger he'd chalked it up to her teenage hormones, although logically he couldn't fathom what about him would say "good breeding".

True he'd been born nearly a noble, but now he was just a freak.

He'd honestly presumed it was just a phase she'd grow out of. He'd figured eventually she'd find some nice handsome prince and forget all about her childish crush on him.

But she didn't. In fact when they'd been reunited to take on Dark Star the constant chemistries of Lina and Gourry had only further emboldened her crush to blossom into self-proclaimed feelings of "true love".

And now, all this time later, she still gazed up at him with that same look of joyful longing.

He stared at the picture, it stared back at him, and then he closed the book.

"Alright." He stated simply to himself, pulling on his cloak and mask. "I'm going to do something about this. Nothing big, but something."

* * *

O O O

* * *

"_Chocolate_…" Lina drooled, hands and nose pressed up against the glass counter.

"It's kinda expensive, Lina." Gourry stated, arching a brow at the outrageous price. In his opinion food was the one thing always worth its weight in gold, but still this was a little excessive.

"Price-shmice!" Lina declared, grabbing him roughly by the towel. "Now are you gonna buy a girl some chocolate, or not?!"

It was then of course, that the swordsman realized he was wearing a towel and nothing else; a fact that the rest of the shop was already more than aware of.

"Eh, no Lina." He replied shaking his head in mild mortification. "I don't have any gold on me."

It was then that Lina also realized that he was only wearing a towel.

And then, as she looked him up and down, his hair still damp from the hot spring. A few drips fell free and trailed their way down his strong swordsman's chest to his navel…

It was then that Lina also realized that he was _only_ wearing a towel…

And for reasons her muddled mind dare not fully entertain, her heart skipped a beat, and then caught up in a rush.

"Erm... unh…" She trailed off slowly, rubbing her flushed face nervously. "That's… fine. Say… how about we… uh… how 'bout we order _room_ _service_, Gourry?"

"Yeah!" Gourry replied his face lighting up as he flashed her a grin that made her whole body flush crimson. "Great thinking, Lina!"

"Right." She sputtered, rubbing the back of her head with a nervous giggle. "Well… heh… why don't you go get your wallet and then meet me back in… erm… _my_ room…"

_What am I doing?!_ Some part of her mind cried in mild terror, but she had no answer for it and the blood rushing through her veins was much louder than such wary thoughts and so they were washed away.

"Heh, still gonna make me pay, aren't you?" He chuckled, giving her another one of those grins and Lina thought any moment now her heart was gonna saw its way from her chest just so it could break free and tap-dance its little way back to her room first.

* * *

O O O

* * *

"Look at them, Xelloss…" Filia breathed in awe, unaware that she was still holding onto his arm. "Diamonds, Sapphires, Emeralds. All of them so very beautiful."

"My, my." He murmured in response, opening both eyes narrowly so she could see the bemusement in his gaze. He needed to see whether or not she noticed to be able to tell just how far gone she was. "Always so greedy, Filia. What is it about treasure and dragons?"

"Am I not a _Golden_ Dragon, Xelloss?" She asked softly, meeting his gaze and drawing in a breath letting it out slowly before turning away and gathering up a gold-chain that held an amethyst amulet.

"You know, Xelloss." She murmured, trying to hold her breathing steady as she fingered the jewel, watching the way the light gleamed against both it and its gold frame. "I never really noticed amethyst before I met you."

"Now." She whispered, holding it up between them. "I can't help but notice it, So strong, so royal… so… deep…"

_Deep??_ He echoed to himself in incredulous delight. _ Hmm, well yes I most certainly am, but I do believe she's completely lost it otherwise there's certainly no way such a shallow dragon could have ever noticed…_

And then he simply couldn't stop himself from narrowing his eyes, and leaning in so very close that he could feel her breath on his face as it accelerated along with her pulse.

"Why, Filia." He murmured smoothly, a cool smirk on his knowing lips. "Are you complementing my eyes?"

"Oh, Xelloss…" She chided softly, unable to break his gaze for even a moment. "I was only speaking of jewelry but what, perchance, if I wasn't?"

_What are you doing, Filia!_ Her soul cried feverishly. _Oh no! This isn't you! Come on!_

But almost as soon as her concerns voiced themselves they lost themselves to his eyes.

Gods help her, she had never been able to forget those eyes.

Those dangerous mazoku eyes…

Only one pair like them in the entire world…

"Then I'd say…" He stated softly, tracing a gloved hand under her chin and leaning in even further so that his whisper was barely an inch from her lips. "All you have to do is ask, Filia, and I'd steal you _both_ away, back to your room."

He would, she could see it reflecting out at her in those cold and yet blazing amethyst shards…

"Steal it away for me, Xelloss." She breathed, stepping in closer and gazing into his eyes helplessly. Something wasn't right, but she wasn't sure she cared anymore. Not when the mere feel of him standing this close was overwhelming her senses.

"And steal us away too."

* * *

O O O

* * *

"Lina?" Gourry called, knocking on her door eagerly.

"It's open." She called lazily from inside and he opened the door

"L… Lina?" He stared, taking in the seen before him in mild awe. "Wow. Where did you get all those red pillows? And that weird red gaze thing you're wearing? Oh hey! Strawberries!"

"And chocolate sauce…" She stated coyly, swirling a strawberry in it in what was hopefully a seductive matter. "I found I couldn't wait. Still, this was the only kind of chocolate they had, but that should be fine, ne Gourry? Just as long as you're not afraid to be a little _creative_…"

Gourry Gabriev did not know a lot of things, but one of the things he did know was when a woman threw on see-through clothes and busted out the strawberries and chocolate she was wanting you to do more than just feed them too her.

He also knew that if that woman was Lina, then she _really_ wasn't herself.

Luckily, he also knew just how to deal with this!

"Say, Lina!" He declared inching his way towards the door. "You know I think that outfit was really intended for someone with a _larger_ figure."

"What was that?!" She cried, hopping to her feet in rage and Gourry grinned, shutting the door just in time to hear the plate of strawberries to clatter off it.

"Whew." He breathed aloud, resting briefly against the door as Lina yelled curses his way. "This could be trouble; I think I should go find Zelgadiss."

* * *

O O O

* * *

From his space out in the hallway Amelia's door seemed to stretch on above him for meters.

The chimera swallowed softly, shifting the brown-wrapped gift from one stone hand to the other.

_You can do this._ He told himself, pulling himself upright and stepping forward. _Just knock on the door, she'll invite you in, and then you just give it to her! You already know she'll like it for chaos sake!_

"Right." He muttered, proper pep-level now achieved and squelched the last of his doubt as he rapped on the door.

"Oh, please tell me that's you, Mr. Zelgadiss!" Her excited voice called from the other side and he couldn't help but grin.

_See?_ He told himself coolly. _No problem. She's totally into you, remember?_

"Yeah." He stated calmly. "It's me." _It's me? Nice._

_Shut up!_ He told himself, readjusting himself back into confidence as he heard Amelia shift something around on the other side of the door.

"Come in!" She giggled, and with an easy grin, the chimera did.

And then his jaw dropped…

There were flowers… everywhere...

_Everywhere.._.

Floor, bed, dressers, bathroom, everywhere…

And amidst the pale blue and purple flowers that covered Amelia's bed lay the princess, clothed in nothing but a periwinkle negligee.

"Oh—bu—" He sputtered his mind latching onto only one of his many thoughts as he yelped. "What if it _hadn't_ been me??"

"Silly!" She giggled, rolling over and cupping her hands under her chin as she gazed lovingly at him. "Who else would it be? Destiny would only bring me my true love in my hour of need!"

"Hour of…" Zelgadiss trailed off, clutching her present helplessly.

He had no idea what was going on, but this wasn't Amelia, and that was no good.

"Mr. Zelgadiss?" She asked worriedly, and he could see the fear of rejection in her eyes. "Is something wrong?"

"No!" He replied quickly, unable to bring himself to hurting her as he stepped to the door. "But I have to go check on something! Erm, I'll be back as soon as I can!"

Almost instantaneously her face fell and then lit back up again as she grabbed a flower from the bed.

"Then I shall count the seconds until your return!" She declared, plucking off a petal with a happy smile. "One petal at a time."

"Good!" He agreed, flashing her a quick smile.

"I'll just be right back, then."

* * *

_**Oh Xelloss, you monster you... (n.-)  
**_

_____**See ya tomorrow! (n.n)**_


	6. Chapter Six

**DISCLAIMER_: _**_**I still do not own the Slayers... (n.n)  
**_

* * *

_And now time for Xelloss to misbehave, yet again! **(n.n)**  
_

_**- Nicci**_

* * *

_**Special Thanks To:**__**

* * *

**_

**Humi**

_Heh! Oh no, **Valentine's Day Magic** is far to dangerous to unleash on the world of The Slayers! Hee! Nah, I'm afraid, it's a bit more simple than that. Let me know if you guessed it! __**(n.n)**_

* * *

**Shadow Ice Maiden**

_Ah! But where would be the fun in not letting them remember! They're half-alert as it is! **(n.-)**_

**

* * *

Elsil**

_I'm glad you liked it! Mostly all will be revealed today!_ _**(n.n)**_

* * *

**Kayla-chan1990**

_Hee! Thank you! Amelia is acting how Amelia would if her love was given a boost. It's hard to write these sort of things and still keep them IC, your words let me know that I'm doing a good job of it, so thank you yet again!**

* * *

**_**fantasia-49**

_Yea! _**-x-**_Rockdad grins and gives a couple of little bows_**-x-**_ Thank you, thank you! Hee! __**(n.n)**_

* * *

**silver kikyou**

_Heh, yes indeed! Xelloss is very, **very** bad, naughty even! **(n.-)**_

**

* * *

****VFIN**

_Heh! Awesome! Then I'm doing my job._ _**(n.-)**_

* * *

**Chapter Six**

_Scooby Time…

* * *

_

"Xelloss… I…" Filia sputtered, uncertain what to do or what to say. Uncertain if she wanted him to stop her or… or what…

"You're not, yourself?" He offered, finishing her words with a knowing smirk, pressing her against the door frame, one hand latched into her hair holding her gaze to him as the other held her in place at the hip. "Does it really matter? That just gives you deniability in the future."

"It's really… it's really all the same to you, isn't it, Xelloss?" Filia asked in awe.

"Everything's all the same to me, Filia." He murmured against her ear, letting the hand at her hip slip lower, dangerously so. "It's just a matter of whether or not I find it boring, and I never find _you_ boring."

Filia made a strangled sort of cry, grabbing his trespassing wrist. "Wait!"

As soon as the words left her lips there came an anxious knock at the door.

Xelloss smirked, pulling his wrist from her grasp and raising his finger wanly as his other hand grudgingly released her hair. "See! Always surprising, never boring!"

Calmly, knowing precisely how this would look, he wandered over and opened the door.

Zelgadiss glanced at him, and then glanced at Filia and sighed heavily. "So it's happening on your end too."

"Wha… what's happening?" Filia panted, her emotions and pulse still racing from Xelloss' touch and words.

"Yes!" Xelloss beamed delightedly, cracking a knowing eye at the chimera. "Just what _is_ happening, Zelgadiss!"

Zelgadiss cast the bewildered dragoness a wary look and forced himself to smile. "Uh, nothing really. I just need to ask Xelloss'… er… _advice_ on something. Man to… well chimera to mazoku."

"Oh." Filia replied, still a little off guard. "Alright then. I'll just wait here, I guess."

"An excellent idea, Filia!" Xelloss agreed easily, hanging his head back in from the hall with a mischievous grin. "Don't forget where we left off!"

Filia flushed crimson, and Xelloss beamed shutting the door.

_Heh, mission accomplished! Well, it wasn't really a mission, but I feel it went well! _

_Whatever it was…_

_Wonder if I can do it again… hmm…_

"We need to stop this!" Zelgadiss declared warily, once Xelloss had joined him and Gourry out in the hallway.

"I rather think I like her this way!" Xelloss grinned, rubbing the back of his head merrily. "For the time being anyway it presents great fun! And whatever it is it doesn't appear to be _too _terribly strong! I'm sure it'll wear off! Eventually."

"You're suggesting we just wait it out?" Zelgadiss replied, crossing his arms in disgust.

"Do you have another suggestion?" Xelloss beamed.

"Maybe we could wait it out." Gourry stated tapping his chin. "If we, I don't know, quarantined them or something in their rooms and then just distracted them with food and shiny things…"

"I'm not really certain that'd work on anyone but, Lina, Gourry." Zelgadiss countered dryly.

"Well I could _personally_ attend to Miss Filia, till the effects wear off." Xelloss offered, cracking his eyes as his grin doubled. "Sure there would be _consequences_ when they finally do, but I wouldn't really mind those either."

"Fruitcake." Zelgadiss muttered, rolling his eyes in disgust.

"Wait, _consequences_…" Gourry echoed in soft terror, glancing at them desperately as it sunk in. "Consequences! We have to fix this now! Or Lina really might try to kill me!"

"Actually…" The chimera swallowed looking at Xelloss warily. "Lina might really try to kill _all_ of us…"

"Right!" Xelloss replied, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly. "Well then, let's split up and try to find the culprit in the hopes that killing him might be enough!"

* * *

O O O

* * *

"Well!" Xelloss stated phasing in and leaning on his staff with a dark grin. "That jewelry shop owner had a lot of blood but not nearly enough information to keep him alive! All he knew was business was good! _Was_, being the imperative tense there!"

"We get it, Xelloss." Zelgadiss muttered giving him a cool glare. "Nothing from the flower shop either, unless you count it as relevant that they do good business as well."

"And you, Gourry!" Xelloss asked curiously, arching a brow.

"Heh!" Gourry grinned, wiping his lips. "Nothing but some free chocolate! Business is so good they have to make a fresh batch everyday and then they just toss out the old! Apparently its cause there's hardly ever any left!"

"All three shops do well then, eh!" Xelloss replied, tapping his chin. "Hmm."

"Well that's hardly a coincidence." Zelgadiss muttered with a shrug. "This town makes it's living off hapless romantics afterall."

"What if…" Xelloss' smirk darkened, as he leaned in. "The town mayor decided to give his economy a little _boost_!"

"By using this bizarre romance obsession to make the women want to buy more things... or have them bought for them." Zelgadiss nodded in disgust, arching an inquisitive brow. "But how?"

As soon as he asked, the answer coming to him almost instantly and Xelloss nodded his agreement.

"The hot springs." The chimera muttered shaking his head in disgust as Xelloss grinned ecstatically.

"Those bastards put it in the water."

* * *

_**Oh no! (n.n)**_

_____**Hee! See ya tomorrow! (n.-)**_

_**P.S. On a side note, V-Day magic may be to potent to unleash on the world of the Slayers but I'm not above subjecting them to a little V-Day capitalism! (n.-)  
**_


	7. Chapter Seven

**DISCLAIMER_: _**_**I still do not own the Slayers... (n.n)  
**_

* * *

_And now for the girls to snap out of it, or perhaps just snap! **(n.-)**  
_

_**- Nicci**_

* * *

_**Special Thanks To:**__**

* * *

**_

**Humi**

_Heh! Nah, you got it.** (n.n) **Well done!_

* * *

**Shadow Ice Maiden**

_Heh, something funny, of course! **(n.n)**_

**

* * *

Tanwen Whitefire**

_Tee-hee and that will be explained by what they couldn't possibly know!_ _**(n.n)**_

* * *

**Lon Wolfgood**

_Right? At heart that's sorta the "moral" of the tale... erm... Slayers Style of course!_ _**(n.-)**_

* * *

**Kayla-chan1990**

_Thank you! Heh, silly Xelloss... **(n.-)**  
**

* * *

**_**fantasia-49**

_Yea for XelFi cuteness__! Hee! __**(n.n)**_

* * *

**silver kikyou**

_Heh, indeed, quite crazy! Thanks! **(n.-)**_

**

* * *

****VFIN**

_Heh! Glad I could keep ya on your toes.._ _**(n.-)**_

* * *

**Chapter Seven**

_For Shame Mr. Valmouth…

* * *

  
_

"You can't go in there!" The petite brunette cried, hopping up from her chair to stop them.

"Gourry!" Zelgadiss ordered, not bothering to stop.

"Right!" The swordsman declared and Xelloss grinned in amusement as he flicked the assistant a triple-chocolate truffle.

"Chocolate!" She squealed, catching it and immediately retreating back to her desk to consume it.

"So its spread to the entire female populace." Zelgadiss muttered, throwing open the door and pointing at the balding man behind the desk with the nameplate Valmouth atop it. "You sick bastard!"

"Er… I'm gonna have to call you back…" The man muttered to the hazy face in his crystal ball.

"You!" The chimera bellowed marching forward, causing Mr. Valmouth to give a small _eep_ of fear. "You poisoned the water with some sorta… _love_-drug or lust-spell! Didn't you! Didn't you!"

Valmouth stared at him with wide eyes and then leapt over the desk and fell to his knees clutching the chimera's leg in horror. "Yes! Gods help me its true! But I had no idea! I have three daughters! Three! Did you know that! Them and my wife, who's now only quite naturally expecting another! All day long they demand that I buy them flowers, jewels, and chocolate! They've all gotten so _fat_! And I…"

He stopped sobbing, head held low as he let out his final admission in barely a whisper. "Now, I'm just plain broke."

"That's cause you thought too small and didn't open up a store that carries all three!" Xelloss replied, arching a finger smartly. "Why that's just good business!"

Zelgadiss shot him a glare before lifting Valmouth up by the collar. "What did you use?"

"It's a rare type of orchid!" He sputtered. "Harmless to men but **_women_**! Ha! Well you can see the results! We ground it up and add it to the hot springs, allowing the women to inhale it in the gas. I got the idea while traveling aboard! You see, because of its effects on women it's often used for fertility rituals on a particular coast just off the Demon Sea! That's where I found the terrible thing! Gods forgive me! I'm so sorry! I did not know!"

"I've vacationed there a time or two in the past!" Xelloss stated fondly. "Not only do women outnumber men three to one but you can enjoy all the benefits of being fawned over without any sort of love or coziness! All of them beyond overwhelmed by lust and greed! Wonderful place really!"

"Well, if it really is just a… _toxin_" Zelgadiss mused aloud, ignoring Xelloss useless and disturbing input. "Then a simple healing spell ought to do the trick. Go get the girls, Xelloss."

He arched a brow pointedly. "Starting with Filia, that way you won't have any time to do anything fruity to her."

"Honestly Zelgadiss!" He chided fading away. "I do believe if I did anything to Miss Filia it would be the exact _opposite_ of fruity!"

Zelgadiss rolled his eyes, crossing his arms and setting his jaw till Xelloss reappeared with Filia in his arms.

"Wait!" Filia cried as he set her down. "But you said…"

Zelgadiss shot him a warning glare and Xelloss beamed back at him innocently, quickly placing a shushing finger to the dragoness' lips. "Maybe later! If you're still interested!"

"Now for Amelia then!" He stated smartly, disappearing and this time reappearing almost instantly.

"Mr. Zelgadiss!" She cooed, latching onto to him as Xelloss grinned and phased out to grab Lina.

"Amelia." He replied by way of greeting flushing crimson.

"And here's Lina!" He beamed, proudly dropping the sorceress on the floor. "She wouldn't leave without her chocolates."

"Bonbons." She corrected gruffly, through a mouthful of said bonbons.

"Alright." Zelgadiss stated softly, taking a deep breath. "I'll start with, Amelia."

"Start what with me, Mr. Zelgadiss?" She asked innocently.

"There…" He swallowed dryly, trying to keep his features soft as he smiled. "Well, that is… There was something in the water, and I just need to cast a healing spell on you to make sure you're safe from it."

"Oh, Mr. Zelgadiss!" She sighed, clasping her hands together happily. "You're always so protective of me!"

"I…" Zelgadiss shrugged helplessly, tossing her a sheepish smile. "Well I guess I am, actually. You ready?"

Amelia nodded, stepping in closer for no reason other than to show how ready she was for anything he had to offer. He swallowed once more and then steeled himself, lifting his hands. "_RECOVERY!"_

_Amelia blinked a couple of times as the healing glow dissipated. _

_Then, her jaw dropped… _

"Oh no! Mr. Zelgadiss, I--!"

"Don't worry about it." He cut in quickly, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Just heal Filia, I'll… eh… I'll take care of _Lina_."

"She's not gonna be happy…" Amelia whispered in a small scared tone.

"I know." Zelgadiss sighed running a hand through his wiry hair, and scowling at still kneeling Mr. Valmouth. "And she has a good reason not to be."

Amelia also cast the kneeling man a cool frown and then pertly turned to Filia as Zelgadiss braved Lina.

"Ready?" He asked her and Amelia nodded, each holding their hands high as Filia blinked curiously from her place on Xelloss' arm and Lina shoveled down bonbons.

_ "**RECOVERY!**"_

"Oh!" Filia cried, dropping Xelloss' arm and stepping back, pointing at him in fury with one hand as the other went for her mace. "Why, you! You disgusting! Vile!"

"Should I take that as you _don't_ want me to do what I offered to do to you!" Xelloss tittered, hovering back a ways so that her first enraged swing took out the door to the office.

"Yes!" She bellowed, lunging after him once more with mace. "To even think that I… that I…"

And then she lost it, growling in fury and glowing gold as she transformed into her draconic form in order to better catch the giggling mazoku and bite his head off.

Amelia and Zelgadiss watched as Filia took flight, ripped off the roof, and then proceeded to light the town aflame with laser-breath as Xelloss laughed and dodged with ease.

"Poor Miss Filia." Amelia whispered.

"Poor you too." Zelgadiss offered with a sad smile only to blink as the princess slowly shook her head, a small sad smile of her own in place.

"No, Mr. Zelgadiss." She replied softly, and held back a gasp as her hand slipped gently into his. "I just wish I could be that brave with you all the time. I truly do love you."

The princess smiled softly then, and leaned her head against his stone shoulder watching the roaring flames, and while he couldn't stop the small blush tinting his cheeks, the chimera found himself smiling as well.

"Lina?" Gourry asked, braving himself to gently turn her to him by her quivering shoulders. Her face was covered by her crimson bangs, but he could easily see the rest of her had now turned the same shade to match. Except for her tightly clenched fists, they were white, _bight_ white. "Are you okay?"

She was mumbling something under her breath and he couldn't quite tell what so he braved leaning in a little closer.

Oh, _that's_ what it was.

_"**--****by the power you and I possess! DRAGON SLAVE!-DRAGON SLAVE!-DRAGON SLAVEEEE!!!**"_

* * *

_____**Join us tomorrow for the wittily romantic conclusion! (n.-)**_


	8. Chapter Eight

**DISCLAIMER_: _**_**I still do not own the Slayers... (n.n)  
**_

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_And now for the exciting conclusion..._

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_**Special Thanks To:**__**

* * *

**_

**Shadow Ice Maiden**

_Right?! Heh, so much for catching a little R and R! Heh, that's alright, compared to **Slayers:Dedicated**, that really was a vacation. Thanks for joining in on the fun!** (n.-)**  
_

* * *

**Humi**

_Yea! I'm glad you got it right, and equally glad that I get the opportunity to give Filia a chance to shine as the person I believe she was on her way to becoming. Thank you for your constant readership. **(n.n)**_

**

* * *

Kayla-chan1990**

_Indeed! When all else fails burn it with fire! And if the poison is just some flowers, then it'll burn all the better! Hee, hope to see you on the next adventure!_ _**(n.n)**_

* * *

**Elsil**

_Thanks for the Kudos.__ (Heh, hope it was a pleasant surprise!) See you later on The Pledge.__**(n.-)**_

* * *

**BallSabre**

_Hee, VFIN, ha! I get it... **(n.n) **Heh, gotta love Filia's temper, one of her most charming traits, ne?! Hee! (Hope to see ya around.) **(n.-)**  
**

* * *

**_**fantasia-49**

_Hee, indeed they are scary sometimes__! But you gotta love it. As always, thank you for all your kind words. __**(n.n)**_

* * *

**Tanwen Whitefire**

_Eh? What town? Nah! Just kidding, I deal with that here. Thanks for reading, hope you dig the end! **(n.-)**_

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**Chapter Eight**

_The Truest Intoxication…

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_

"_AQUA CREATE!_" Lina declared softly, holding up her hand before the steaming crater. The first stream of water merely cooled and Lina sighed calling out once more. "_AQUA CREATE!_"

"_AQUA CREATE!_"

"_AQUA CREATE!_"

"_AQUA CREATE!_"

**"_AQUA CREATE!_"**

"Hey, Lina." Gourry asked carefully, stepping in place warily besides the panting sorceress who still had her hand up for one more go. "Can I ask you a question?"

"That… was… a… question… Gourry…" She panted, arching a brow at him sardonically. "But you can ask another."

"Right!" He nodded, wincing slightly. It hurt to nod, he was still a bit singed from the explosion. "It's just, why are you turning your big dragon slave hole into a lake?"

Lina smiled softly. "So in case those fleeing towns people talk no one will ever have any evidence of what happened here, Gourry."

"Do you think they'll be alright?" Gourry asked worriedly and Lina shrugged.

"Don't see why not." She sighed. "Some part of me was still myself so I imagine the effects will wear off in time now that they have no more way to distribute this crazy poison."

She smiled up at him wanly. "Oh, and I'd apologize for the singeing, but I think that makes us about even for your comment about my _figure_."

"I like your figure just fine, Lina." He replied with an easy smile of his own. "It was the outfit I wasn't so fond of. I like _you_, Lina. You know that."

Lina nodded, a tired little smile on her lips. "Yeah Gourry, I know that. It's the _why_ that I still can't quite piece together."

Gourry swallowed, looking out at the calm lake before them. "You really don't know?"

Lina shook her head softly, looking at him helplessly. "No Gourry. I mean look at today! All that happened was that I got a little… erm… tipsy I suppose and ending up hitting on you. Then as a result, I got so mad at myself I blew up a whole town! Why, Gourry! Why have you stayed with me this long! How can you possibly like me just the way I am!"

"Because, Lina." He whispered, grabbing her by the shoulders and turning her towards him. "I don't just like you, I love you. Your flaws, your strengths, you Lina, I can't even begin to put it into words when all the words in my mind just turn into Lina. Cause it's just you, Lina. You're you."

"Oh… Gourry…" Lina whispered, placing a hand to his chest and swallowing hard. "The fact that you see me like that! That _you_ see _me_ like _that_! That's why…"

She broke off, her ruby gaze swimming deep with in his. "That's why I love you too."

And there, on the edge of what would be forevermore known as Lake Vailis, the midnight stars and quarter moon shinning down on them from the indigo sky, a swordsman finally took his sorceress up into his arms for the second time in their lives.

The third was soon to follow…

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O O O

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They walked along in silence for a bit, the princess and the chimera. The back of his shirt had been burned mostly off by the flames as he'd whisked Amelia away from Lina's wrath; but now as they walked along hand in hand in this forest of moss, pine, and stone, he didn't even notice.

"Amelia… I." He chuckled, releasing her hand and ran a hand through his wiry hair. "Well, before all this, the reason why I'd showed up at your room tonight was…"

He swallowed, pulling the parcel out from the front of his cloak and held it out to her. "I bought you this."

"You brought me a present, Mr. Zelgadiss?" Amelia asked softly, her face alight in childish glow as she held his gaze before gently taking it from him.

No, not childish, he'd always thought that's what that look had been but now he knew better.

That was the look of pure love.

That was a look reserved only for him, and the small swallow it always invoked was reserved especially for her.

It had finally sunk in. Only Amelia could soften his stone heart.

Only Amelia could remind him at all times that he had one.

"Oh!" She gasped, in awe holding up the tiny figurine. "It's beautiful! But it's…"

Her eyes met his in a breathtaking display of overwhelming joy.

"It's you." He confirmed, with a soft smirk. "As a Fairy Princess. I brought in a sketch of you as such and had then had them make it up."

"This is how you see me, Mr. Zelgadiss?" She asked, her eyes holding his in a bliss that he couldn't find the will to tear himself away from.

"Not even close, you're much too alive Amelia, to be captured in glass." He whispered softly, unable to stop himself from reaching out and slipping a stone hand under her chin. "But it's the best I could do to capture the way you make me feel."

Amelia smiled softly, a small tear of happiness leaking its way from her sapphire orbs. "Oh Mr. Zelgadiss. If I can make you feel like that, then that makes me feel… oh I can't even begin to fathom this feeling in my heart!"

She gasped, her words cut off as his lips met hers, hesitantly at first. Still, despite all this he still worried somehow that she hadn't really thought this through. That she hadn't really considered him for him, and this was all just a fantasy to her.

But then she kissed him back, and he realized just how silly a thing that was to think.

This was love, it was nothing if it wasn't a fantasy. It was simply one that was also true.

He supposed Amelia would say it was exactly that.

True love.

* * *

O O O

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Up above in the tree boughs the fairies he'd unwittingly liberated lounged atop the leaves, their hands cupped under their chins and their knees bent so that their feet swished slowly through the air behind them.

_True love, isn't it beautiful…_ One declared happily to another with a few swishes of his wings.

_Aye. That it be... _The elder agreed with a nod of his head and swish of his own wings. _For such a strange looking fellow to snag that great beauty's heart, what else in all the world dare it be…_

_True love…_ Another sighed, swishing her wings blissfully. _Such great power in such a thing…_

_Aye. That's why it be so rare…_ The elder agreed sagely.

_Heh…_ The first smirked, standing up and stretching out as they prepared to take off. _Should we tell him that since we're fairies we could turn her true love for him into a magic spell that would be a cure for his freaky looking skin rash!_

_Nah…_ The elder replied, leading the others high up into the starry night sky. _I think she sorta likes him this way…_

_Besides…_

_Where would be the fun in that…_

_

* * *

_O O O

* * *

"So then." Xelloss stated amiably, phasing in beside the flying dragoness and cracking a knowing eye. "Are you just going to fly all the way back home!"

"Yes." She replied, trying desperately to look straight ahead. "And then I'm never going to take another vacation ever again!"

"Well that's just silly!" He chided, arching a finger with a grin. "Why not just let me _take_ you home instead!"

"Because it's you I want most to avoid!" She twitched, beating her wings faster and trying to gain speed even though he could match any pace she set with ease. "But you know _that_, don't you?!"

"Of course I do!" He replied with a smug smirk. "And you must know that I'm just going to follow you all the way back anyway!"

"Ugh! Why!" She muttered, trying desperately keep from letting the tears of embarrassment and frustration threatening to well up in her eyes fall free. "Why could you possibly want to do that!"

"For the tea of course!" He replied amiably, cracking and eye and arching a finger. "And…"

"If you say the words scones, Xelloss so help me I!" She glowered, breaking off sullenly as it occurred to her there was nothing she could seriously threaten him with.

She hated that! Hated that he was so impervious and meanwhile she could fall pray to a little tainted water!

It just wasn't fair!

_But that wasn't what really did you in, now was it?_ Her mind asked treacherously and she sighed, crying out and tossing all of her rage, all of her weakness, and all of her embarrassment into her golden transformation.

Calmly, her feet touched the ground and she met his gaze as he phased in calmly beside her.

"Fine, Xelloss." She whispered softly, wiping a single traitorous tear from her cheek. "Take me home. I'll make Chamomile."

She expected some taunt, so irritating jibe, or even a smug smirk but he gave her none of those things.

Instead, he calmly stepped forward, wrapped his arms around her and phased her away to her living room.

Jilas had left Val's egg by a roaring fire where it could be warm and Xelloss set her down, taking a seat in one of her over-sized, over-comfortable plush chairs.

He watched her kneel down and kiss the egg gently, watched her look back at him with that half-suspicious, half-awed look she always gave him whenever he did anything _nice_ and sighed, sinking back into the chair.

"You really want to know, why, Filia?" He asked softly, his eyes falling open as he stared into her. "The why to all of _this_?"

Filia swallowed standing up slowly and giving a little nod.

He smirked, gripping each armrest calmly. "Then come over here, and if you can tolerate sitting on my lap. I'll share the secret with you."

"Nothing's ever free with you, is it Xelloss." Filia whispered, a smile threatening to tug on her lips.

"Only pain." He replied calmly. "But you knew that."

"Take whatever you can, from whomever you can." She stated softly, making her way across the room slowly. "And never do any service for free."

"Save any done for the one I was created for." He replied calmly. "And yet still, you knew that."

"Yes." She replied softly, swallowing gently before letting him pull her onto his lap. "I knew that."

She felt his arms wrap around her, holding her to him as she tilted her head back to meet his seemingly emotionless gaze. "Now tell me something I don't know. Tell me why you come here. Tell me why you persist to follow and harass me. Tell me why you…"

Her cheeks flushed, as she recalled his words and his actions in the previous hours of the night. Her hand went to her throat and confirmed that yes, she was still wearing that stolen amulet.

She'd return it, but now there was nowhere to return it too…

"Because, Filia." He murmured slowly, a wan smirk on his lips as he tilted his head to appraise her. "You fascinate me. Everything you do. I liked having you pressed up against me practically begging me for more. I like watching you make tea in the mornings. I'd like to find a way to combine the two actually…"

**_SLAP!_**

Filia swallowed softly, her eyes wide as her still raised hand hung in the air between them. Xelloss blinked, his smirk darkening as he pulled her closer, snaking a hand into her hair and pulling her face close to his. "And I _love_ that."

Filia gasped as in a single breathtaking instant his lips closed the space between them. It was as though there had never even been space between them or knowing Xelloss, he had been beyond the space between them all along.

She moaned giving into him, her hands pressed up against his chest clutching at his robes as his hands worked delicate but knowing magic across her back and the back of her head.

Finally she had to breathe and she pushed away panting for air.

"L…love?" She echoed helplessly.

"Love." He confirmed simply.

"Good." She replied crisply. "Then this is for the scones."

**_SLAP!

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_**

**_...FIN...  
_**

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_____**And so another story ends, but there are still more.**_

_____**But alas, that was indeed the last of the scones, but perhaps not the fairies. (n.n)**_

_____**Thank you for reading, and thank you for reviewing! See you guys next time!**_

_____**- Nicci  
**_


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